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Writers block [Oct. 25th, 2005|07:51 pm]
[mood | stressed]

I have a 7 page paper due by 1:00 tomorrow.

I have 10 pages of my thesis due by 7:15.

I have a 5 page book review on a book i've read 20 pages of 280 due 1:00 on Thursday.

I have a 2 page reading review on a reading I haven't looked at due Friday.

I have to schedule meetings and organize things for the sorority.

I have to get information ready for the parents meeting following a 3 hour practice Sunday.

I am in a wedding on Friday, which I can't attend the rehersal for.

That's just this week...

I'm going absolutely insane. My brain has literally shut itself off. I have all the research for the 7 page paper sitting infront of me, but my brain just won't work. I don't know what to do. I can't take much more of this...

Caffene does NOTHING for me. I'm always tired. I can't get anything done far ahead of time because there is always something else that has to be finished before it. Joe says I wait too long and that's my problem...but I don't think it's considered putting off work if there's other work that needs to be done first, is it?

ASFDIJALKSDJFASKDJFASLKDJFAWIERGJNDFBLKSDFGIESRGDFVJDFGKAWEIRV
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Hi [Jul. 21st, 2005|06:56 pm]
I just wanted to throw in an update for anyone who may read this (hi roomie) that i'm alive, just busy...so thanks for reading :)
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Blah [Jun. 27th, 2005|06:45 pm]
[mood | crappy]

So when I was at work on Sunday I sat down and handwrote a ton of stuff that was on my mind. It helped clear it a lot. I never really realize how much is bothering me until I start getting it out. I didn't realize how bad I was, either, until I went to the doctor last week and told him how tired I was all the time and he said it was from stress. Then one night I just went on a tangent to Joe for like, 3 hours and now i'm not having the sleeping problems anymore, which is good, but it makes me wonder how unhealthy I am without realizing it.
I've been in such a blah mood lately. I dunno why. I guess 'cuz other than that 4 days we went away to Lancaster, I haven't had a real vacation at all. I've been going non-stop since like, January. Not good for me. I went from having time to myself everyday (which I have learned to need, being an only child and all) to having none. It's not working out so well and my body is finally kicking my ass. I went out last night with people from school and had so much fun. It made me feel a lot better. Today dragged me back down though. There was an issue at work and now i've been doing nothing but homework all night. Ugh.
I dunno...hopefully I feel better soon. I'm tired of feeling like this and i'm tired of taking it out on everybody else :(
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It's a bright big beautiful today [Jun. 6th, 2005|12:30 pm]
[mood | chipper]
[music |The song from Christine's journal 'cuz I just read it]

I've been in a crazy good mood all morning and i'm not sure why. I had some random dreams last night, so maybe that worked out my brain or something. I still grinded my teeth tho...grr. One day that'll go away I hope. I woke up and found out that 6 sororities answered us (AZD was one of them so yay...I was a little sad DZ wasn't, but that's ok). Then I drove around switching my prescriptions over to the new CVS and putting some money in the bank. We're going over my grandmoms in a little bit to take our frozen food there so it's out of the way until we get resettled. Last night I was cleaning and realized that the next time I clean, i'll be living in a new house. It's hit me now that I move in a few days. I can't wait to get all settled and everything, but I will miss this house. I lived here for the most important years of my life. I was talking to Joey about it though and realized we lived in the Lumberton house when I was a baby, the old house when I was a child, this house when I was a teenager, and now the new house when i'm (gasp) and adult. Then they'll move one more time when I move out to get married, and that'll be their retirement home. Weird how time passes. I was thinking again about all the crazy things that happened this year that made it so awesome, but how it made this year fly by. I want to manage my time a little better next year. I want to be able to come home a bit more and to have some down time. I think it's doable as long as I keep AHEAD of stuff, not just ontop of it. Hopefully I can do that.
It's exciting that I reached the mindframe this morning that i'm content with where my life is right now. Not that I wasn't before, but I was questioning if it was where I really wanted to be. Now I know. I smile a lot more and i'm bouncing around a lot more. I think that's like, 95% because the weather is nice and i'm definitely one of those seasonal depressive people. Oh well.
Damn busy weeks ahead of me...

Today: Finalize all packing
Tomorrow: Student Teaching interview, finish all work for summer class due this week
Wednesday: Sorority meeting
Thursday: Pack the truck
Friday: Move
Saturday: Paint, clean, and celebrate Fork Day (don't ask...)
Sunday: Wedding with Mike and homework
Monday: Move into Pier Village
Tuesday: Cheerleading Coaches meeting, homework
Wednesday: Mom's surgery, exam
Thursday: Finalize cheerleading stuff
Friday: Strawberry picking, homework
Saturday: Dry run for work
Sunday: Clean, homework
Monday: Start work until the end of August

Stress free summer? yeah, ok...lol
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How is it already the summer of 2005??? [Jun. 3rd, 2005|10:57 am]
[mood | contemplative]

So everyone seems to have a live journal, so being my trendy self I switched for this summer. Let the journaling begin :)

I've been thinking about this past year a lot this week. It's been insane. I've done everything i've ever wanted to do, and I learned so much. I've learned what friendship really is. I've learned that laughing is the best ab workout there is. I've learned that sometimes people just grow apart. I've learned that people are jealous to the point of insanity. I've learned that some people have an internal drive to make others miserable. I've learned that being stronger than these people makes you win, not them. I've learned that some people are immature. I've learned that some people are spoiled. I've learned that it's not what you know, but who you know, and knowing people is awesome. I've learned that sex ruins nothing. I've learned that sex ruins everything. I've learned that having secrets is sometimes so much fun. I've learned that being the other woman is only a rush until guilt sets in, no matter what your feelings are for the guy. I've learned to let go of the past because it will never be that way again. I've learned that you need memories of your past to create your future. I've learned that sometimes you just have to be a dork. I've learned that greek letters really are more than just paying for friends. I've learned that sometimes you will find love where you least expect it. I've learned that sometimes, you may just never get over a loss of something close to you. I've learned that being spontaneous is the way to go. I've learned that spin the bottle is better drunk than sober. I've learned that you can't believe everything that people say. I've learned that not being able to say "I wish I had..." is the best feeling ever. I've learned that having no regrets is a lot better than having them. I've learned that somewhere along the line, me and my childhood friends grew up. I've learned that without organization, my life would be shot. I've learned that sometimes not planning things out makes them more fun. I've learned that a power nap on a couch can sometimes be better than a full night of sleep on a bed. I've learned that you really DO need sleep to not die. I've learned that you actually have to brown nose in life or you won't get anywhere. I've learned that being a good person can actually pay off even when other people try to bring you down. I've learned that depression can come out of the blue and kick your ass. I've learned that true friends will bring you out of it. I've learned that anxiety is controlable. I've learned that growing up is a ton of fun.

As cliche as it is, i've learned that I have a lot to learn...
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